28 Dec Turning Point

We are in a huge turning point in the year of 2021. Like two sides of a coin, fear or love. Which one should you choose? I felt this bifurcation when I was going through death of my loved ones and on the other hand birth of my granddaughter Niska. Like walking in two portals of death and birth. These are timelines that we will traverse as humans.

“When we are born death is certain and when we die rebirth is certain. So why are you lamenting? This is a fact of life.” Verse from Bhagavad Gita.

Such a deep and profound wisdom from this sacred book that touched me when I lost Theo. This last week of December was heavy emotionally for me as I was touched by the death of my girlfriend’s son through suicide. It is heavy because I dread that his life was cut short. There are too many unanswered questions..

But truly the reality is we only have now. Facing reality the present moment is hard when you regret something that is not here. As humans we get caught to our pain body. Our life get stuck into this suffering, when we truly don’t have any power or control over our lives. We are only here for such a short trip and we seem to think that we have all the time in the world.

We get stuck in the painful memory, thinking of the future that is not here, or repeat the same old patterns that we keep doing. Whatever it is that you keep repeating make sure you wake up from it and smell the roses. This is all we have now. A lot of people are in a habitual way of conditioning like staying in a marriage that is like a jail. I have been there, it is so stifling. Until one day, you get this awakening that only you will know that you have to make a deal with God. Tell your problems and ask for divine intervention. I did this once. I almost killed my ex-husband. That night was foggy Christmas eve. I took my kids to drive and wanted to go home because my ex-husband did not want to stop drinking. Then, in the middle of the street he stopped the van and I almost hit him. I dropped the kids to my girlfriend’s home and said, “I need a break, can you please take care of the kids?”

That drive to the prayer group was intense, I asked God, “if I can make it through this foggy drive, I will never come back to my ex-husband.” It was miraculous, I cried all the way and never came back. It was just a beginning of a huge sacrifice. Leaving an abusive relationship takes a lot of courage. I stayed in the relationship thinking that I was preserving my family and children from brokenness. I realized now that I was staying because I did not know how to love myself. I allowed abuse in my relationship. When you love yourself, you respect the relationships that you have. Especially your relationship with your own self.

The long way home to loving yourself. Through all the ups and downs, we will come into a full circle with our own selves. It is hard discipline, when you want to get away from sufferings. A lot of universal challenges will test your perseverance. Are you in it for the long haul or just for a short ride? We have to ask help from the spiritual teams that we surround ourselves with. We are never alone. We are with our team in the unseen force of light.

Tonight, I met my neighbor who was heartbroken. I was mesmerized with his innate wisdom. We talked like we have known each other for infinite timelines. Such a beautiful soul, his name sounds like an angel. I loved this divine intervention. I feel attune to the divine grace when it comes like serendipitously. We talked about organized chaos, like our lives are in organized chaos right now.

Our collective is going through this turmoil to help us raise our awareness to what is meaningful with our lives. Without the chaos we will be running on old programming. The metamorphosis that our souls need to experience for the freedom that we long to be. This is the bliss that we want to have. We needed a lot of purification in order to be at home with this sacred space. Our dark night of the soul is our detoxification from the egoic mind. Our wisdom will eventually light our ways when we become super conscious of our existence. We rely to the infinite Source of life. We are nothing when we are attached to the material manifestation, but we are eternal when we understand that our souls are fractals of the Source of all that is. We are never separated from this love, we just forgot that we are part of co-creating this universe.

All our shadows and light aspects are part of the collective. As we transmute the lower vibrations, we become connected to our higher self. This helps us anchor the ancient wisdom that we inherit from our ancestors. We are here to remember that we have signed for this contract. It is in our agreement that we will come here at this juncture and will make a difference in our own unique ways. We are all gifted with the infinite Source. Your gifts are within you as always, unique, marvelous and sovereign only you can give. When you find yourself in a negative emotional roller coaster, recalibrate to a higher note. Get out of the house, talk to your pet or neighbors, surround yourself with plants and positive energies. Be here now, present with open mind and heart to allow, receive and love the messengers that have been brought to your awareness They are God’s gifts of love. Have a blessed New Year beautiful souls and make everyone matters in your Book of Life. Blessings!